straight 2 years on the 25th January of 2010 and 2011
brings a lot of bad memories to me..
it actually should be the greatest memory of all
but the last time I had my good memory on my birthday is in the year 2009
which when the last time I had a party for my birthday
and when I still do have all my fwens around including the one I love
but
2010 - friendship
2011 - relationship
I cried on my birthday..
I still remember in the year 2010
I cried because I felt lonely and I lost my trust to all my friends
for the first time I felt so lonely..
I've been hurt by them on the 24th without they realized
Who ever knew the girl who had so many friends end up losing them one by one
I felt betrayed by them..
thats the reason why I end up being unfriendly to others when I'm doing my foundation
on the first sem..
yeah I admit I don't have many fwens on the first sem
people then tend to misunderstand me as a snobbish girl
I'm afraid to open up to others
I just afraid to be hurt by friendship again
Friends come and go..
I learn that true friend are hard to find and hard to keep
but its OK I learn my lesson
but it's ok duh..
as long as I have all my loves one
they are my family
I'm still happy that I had the chances to celebrate it with them
2011...
I hope for a better day on the 25th
but something came up
a week before my burfday
I had to let go the one I love
what he didn't know was that I wish he could be the first one to wish me
even he is not mine I just hope that he still do care bout me
I wait and I waited for his call
but it was useless
........
one day something came up
and I just got to know that on the 24th he was with someone else
the night which I waited for him
he was having an affair with someone
it hurts me real deep
how stupid I am
to be thinking that he still do care about me
it hurts soo much
and again I cried on my burfday
the thing he never knew
.....
but I'm really thankful to have my fwens by my side
at least I have them
:)
and for the wishes I really appreciate it
it makes me smile sum how
yeah..
I'm such a weak person I cry if I want to
its the only way for me to be strong again
for me letting out the emotions are better than keeping it
but I only cry in front of the people I'm closed to
but some how I wish
I could have a great birthday in the year of 2012
could it happen for a person like me?
I just don't want to loose anyone again on my birthday
having everyone I care about close to me on my birthday without knowing I'll be loosing them
are just enough for me..
......
p/s: I just hope to celebrate my birthday without any tears again,,..
